Dr. Sadie takes on Joblessness

Dear Dr. Sadie,

I've been unemployed for about 18 months. I'm an automotive technician by trade and training. I've given up hope of finding a new job in my field. I recently inherited enough money to start a small business, so I thought I'd give it a go. What business should I start in this economy so that I can be successful?

A Little Disheartened, but Hopeful

I think that you should be in charge of the world. Then you will have lots and lots of money, and you can give it to some of the people that don't have any. Once the poor people have the money, they will give it to the rich people, and the rich people will give it to the pirates.

If you were in charge of the world, you could ask all sorts of important questions, like "why do people have to sweep the floor when it's dirty?" or "why can't I watch the Olympics right now?"

Wedding Bells on the Sleigh

Dear Dr. Sadie,

My boyfriend and I just got engaged. We set a date for next year on Christmas Eve. We are planning a Christmas-themed wedding. What can we do to make the celebration for both our wedding and our favorite holiday?

Christmas Bride

You could mix it up with Christmas and then make another holiday - like Hanukah. You could also put holly wreaths on the door. You could decorate the whole room with holly berries, chains of green and blue, and plastic Christmas trees.

You could wear a wedding dress that is green and red, instead of white. That would be Christmasy, because those are Christmas colors. Instead of the wedding songs, you could play the Charlie Brown music (editor's note: "Charlie Brown music" = "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing.")

You should serve Christmas food, like chicken nuggets and Christmas Pie, wrapped in holly berry paper. At the party, you could open the paper, and there would be a pie, which you could cut into pieces, then sploosh into people's faces. Then they would lick it off and say, "this pie is delicious."

Ch- Ch- Ch- Changes

Dear Dr. Sadie,

There have been lots of changes going on in my life lately. First my Dad got a new job, so we moved to a new state. For a little while, we lived with my grandparents, then we moved into our own house. Then, after just a few months, we moved again. I started at a new school, but then I changed to a different school. On top of all of that, there's a new baby in our house.

I like all of the changes, but it can be a little confusing and stressful. Any ideas?

- Not David Bowie

Nope. No ideas for you. Well, you should probably get to working on your not-so-fun and not-so-interesting chores. You probably have to set the table. If you want to make the chores more fun, set the table with pineapple, and everyone can eat them before dinner.