Bad Decisions

Dear Dr. Sadie,

I have had the same best friend for 45 years, since we were in the same kindergarten. We've had our highs and lows, but "Lola" seems to manufacture drama wherever she goes.

Lola is very flighty, and she makes terrible decisions. She gets involved with unstable men. She can't seem to hold a job. She is bad with money. Whenever something good does happen in her life, she sabotages it.

As a result, as we approach our 50th birthdays, she's alone with mountains of debt and a dead-end, hourly job, and I'm married with three kids who are in college or graduated, a great job, and no debt. I've patiently listened to her complain for years, and I've been very supportive. Lately, she's been resentful of my lifestyle. She's said many hurtful things.

I want to come back with comments about her current situation being a result of her choices, but it seems cruel. Should I let her have it? Should I cut off all ties? Should I remain her friend and let the barrage continue?

- Door Mat

You should get a different friend. Lola should apologize to you. She's not a very good friend.

You could look for a new friend. Babies come from bellies. You could look in a belly for a new baby to be your friend.