Saturday, July 6, 2013

I Sell Cars, Not My Soul

Dear Dr. Sadie,

I sell cars. I'm really good at it. I've sold lots of cars to lots of people. Usually they end up with a good car that meets their needs, and everyone walks away from the transaction feeling good about it. 

Recently, my bosses have started asking us to "upsell" more and more. I have to ask people to buy cars that really don't fit them. Many people have left and mentioned that they were long time customers, but won't be coming back. I'm starting to hate it.

I'd like to get out of this industry to do something else, but I'm not sure what I can do. What can a 40 year old car salesman do for an encore career, Dr. Sadie?

- Sold Out

You could just go home and play car sale. Or maybe you could sell some of your old toys.

You could be a firefighter. I love watching the firefighter show. When you're a firefighter, you get to save other people. That's a good thing. What if people got on fire? Then you could save them.

If you can't be a firefighter, you could be a police officer. Then you could help people cross the road.

Thursday, July 4, 2013

What to Wear

Dear Dr. Sadie,

I am a poor college student (male). I was recently invited to a fancy, dress-up wedding, but I don't have any appropriate clothes for the occasion. I also don't have much money.

What should I wear that's fancy, but also won't cost a lot of money?

- Poor, but Stylish

You should wear a tuxedo. You should go to the clothing store and look for a tuxedo that doesn't cost a lot of money. You could look for one that costs two dollars. That's not much money at all. You could also wear a rose on it. You could also wear some daisies, daffodils and lilies. You should wear some shoes - the kind that my Dada wears for work (editor's note - loafers). You should wear some jewelry. What kind of jewelry? Probably a necklace or a bracelet or something like that.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Stinky Mother-in-Law

Dear Dr. Sadie,

I am blessed with a wonderful, understanding and caring mother-in-law. She accepted me from the minute I got together with her son, and we've been close ever since. She's actually nicer than my own mother.

My problem is that she wears perfume - lots of perfume. I think she must bathe in it. Every time I see her, I have to take a shower right after, and I wash my clothes immediately. I generally have a headache for several hours afterwards, as well.

Under normal circumstances, it's fine (a small price to pay), but she's coming to stay with us for a month. How do I get her to stop wearing perfume or at least tone it down a little?

- The Sniffer

You should say, "would you please get off that thing?" Then she might say, "can I wear it a little bit longer?" Then you can say, "you can wear it when you get home." I think that would work.